Currently Playing Dear Diary My Teen Angst Has a Body Count By From First to Last see related

THURSDAY NIGHT AT 6 PM!!  TACO BELL PARTY, HOSTED BY SHAWN PEARCE AND BRITTNEY ESKELUND!  THE ONE ON RUSSELL PKWY.  BE THERE IF YOU WANT, ALL ARE WELCOME.  

Moving along.........

My thankx to all that commented.  I always did enjoy comments.  Like little Xmas presents everytime I get a new one.

My weekend was the best

Valdosta:  I shouldn't be talkin much about this, on account of 2 people's reputation, so I'm not gonna.  Let's just say it was the best I've had in years.

Bentwood:  Saw everyone I knew in one place at one time.  The best Bentwood show I've been to.  Saw a few buddies I didn't expect; told Alana my dream that involves her; saw a few fights; saw a few make out sessions......quite a few actually.

Also, I have a job at TARGET!!  Very happy about that.  I get like $7.50 an hour workin there, and I'm workin till 3 in the morning till about 9 roughly.

I say that's pretty extreme...but I'm usually up that late.  And pretty much gettin paid being up that late.....no one can beat that shit!!  Cuz I get weekends off, Bizznitches!

LOVE

The theme of the day.  What causes one to feel a sense of acceptance from another person; or a sense of strong feelings towards objects, animals,  other people, etc.

We all want to love; we all want to be loved.  It's such a good feeling. Whether it's from your parents, your sibling, a good friend, your pet,and of course, your companion.

The reason why I'm writing about this theme is because I now finally realize I am loved.  Loved by many.  This evening at VYC opened my eyes about love, though their theme was about sex.  Mighty ironic, if you ask me. 

What truly opened it up for me was Dustin when he spoke after the pastor.  They gave him the mic so he could speak for a few minutes.  I went to congratulate him, he hugged me with a passion, told me he loved me.  I could tell he meant it.  Hearin it from him was just a good feeling.  It brought us closer.  (no, im not gay, loyal readers.  It was a real touchy, vulnerable moment.)

I'm sick of gettin these letdowns. 

 I'm sick of not takin these chances. 

 I'm sick of not bein with somebody. 

 I'm sick of gettin told I'm not your type. 

 I'm sick of seein all this love around me.

  I'm sick of just plain not havin a companion!!!

I would appreciate havin 30 comments this go around.  By then, I'll have something fun to talk about.  Please do give comments if you read.  It's good etiquette.

Currently Playing Americana [ECD] By The Offspring see related

Have you ever.....

.............walked through a room, but it was more like the room passed around you, like there was a leash around your neck that pulled you through?

............been at someplace, recognizing everybody's face until you realized that there was no one there you knew?

............buried your face in your hands because no one around you understands, or has the slightest idea what it is that makes you be?

............felt like there; was more like someone else was keeping score, and what could make you whole was simply out of reach?

I attended a birthday party Saturday night.  Hosted by none other than the now 16-year old "Asian Sensation," Alana Dy.  I enjoyed it thoroughly, not to mention the food.  ORGASMIC, as you could tell with my eating habits.  Even when I fell, I laughed.  I thik I scared someone while laughin on the ground with a sore body.

Also, I attended VYC again.  Third time in a row, new record for me.  Tonite, it was about SEX.  The dreaded 3-letter word that has people shakin in their skivvies.  It'll even make your pants feel smaller. 

While listening to P. Matt about this, a good bit made sense.  The typical things:  abstinence till marriage, constant masturbation is a sin, lookin at porn for hours on end.

This is where it gets a bit ridiculous:  He's saying that masturbation ITSELF is a sin.  He's telling me that we can't even have sex with ourselves.  I know this is a strange thing to talk about on xanga, but COME ON!!  It's like basically not even thinking lustfully about the opposite sex until one is married.  I know for a fact that most people are savin themselves for marriage, and I have no beef towards that.  I admire their willpower, though I prolly will end up like that myself.

Moving along from that subject..............................

Another thing P. Matt mentioned was about saving ourselves.  He said GOD is tryin to protect those still saving themselves from making a big mistake.  To help maintain our purity.  Hearing that, it made me wonder:  could that be why I have maintained a state of abstinence......or was it the fact that I am not found sexually attractive???  Please help me answer

Currently Playing Morning View By Incubus see related

- -

Ever heard the saying:

"If you truly love somebody, it's best to let them go.  Let them be with who they really want."

I just really wanna point out that one must always follow it, because I have.  It's a bittersweet ending, but nonetheless a good one.